River Dart 2025
Probably the maddest kayak weekend in MKC history
Twenty-three brave (and possibly misguided) MKC members descended upon the peaceful moors of Dartmoor — peace that lasted roughly three minutes. The mission: paddle 2–3 rivers. The result: chaos, carnage, comedy, and some top-quality kayaking.
Day 1 — The Great Car Park Ballet
Just escaping the accommodation car park took half an hour and looked like a cross between the dodgems and a driving test gone wrong. Twenty-point turns were the order of the day.
Then John got lost in the monster truck. Twice. Once going to the river, then again finding the get-out.
We eventually made it onto the River Tavy — a lovely Grade 2–3 run — where Shaun set a new MKC record for the fastest capsize ever recorded: approximately half a second after launch. Or did Yann push him over???
Five capsizes later, we reached the weir, where Martina provided the day’s best drama, losing both her boat and (briefly) her dignity. The boat was last seen orbiting the weir like it had entered its own gravitational field.
Back at base, a giant beech tree had decided to fall across the entrance, blocking our return — perhaps Dartmoor’s way of saying, “you shall not pass.” “Or bugger off”
Day 2 — The Dart Strikes Back
The River Dart was at a glorious level — and the car park was once again a scene of utter confusion, with vehicles performing interpretive dance. Miraculously, everyone managed to arrive at the put-in without getting lost. (Probably a first in MKC history.)
After a shuttle that defied logic but somehow worked, we split into three groups and tackled the legendary Dart Loop:
The Washing Machine, Triple Falls, Spin Dryer — all the classics.
There were swims from both the experienced paddlers (for dramatic effect) and the beginners (for realism).
At the end, Shaun decided to practise his rolling. Andy, helpfully, suggested he try it at the top of the weir “for motivation.” (We’re still unsure if that was a joke.)
Back at base, Chef Kirk outdid himself with a giant buffet feast — proving that having a professional chef in the club is the best idea ever. The evening descended into pub games, line dancing, and enough chaos to cause more injuries than the river.
Day 3 — Déjà Dart
We ran the Dart Loop again. Nobody got lost (much), everyone stayed mostly upright, and we finally gave Dartmoor back to the ponies.
Final Scorecard:
- Lost drivers:
Lost kit:
Lost boat: - Classic swims: too many to count
- Monster truck moments: several
- Pub games carnage: extensive
- Fun had by all: absolutely.Conclusion:
The Dart Trip — proof that MKC can turn any calm, scenic weekend into a comedy masterpiece on (and occasionally in) the water.
